Regular Dad, In Your Face

Sorry for being a week late, I've been so busy that I didn't have time to finish anything really.  As an apology, here is a quick video preview on Regular Dad.

One thing I'm trying to do is shoot this series mostly with an iPhone\iPod\iPad. If that doesn't work out, I have other cameras to use, but I thought that this would be an interesting and challenging way to get it done, plus if I get any quick video while out and about I don't have to worry about the quality edits or aspect changes, or anything like that, so there's that.

The first episode should be out soon, so don't get your knickers in a knot. Unless you like them that way, in that case, don't untie them.  I'm always open to suggestions and feedback, so let it rip.

I'm sure you've been wondering about how my diet has been going, well it's going.  I have cheat days more often than I should, but I have non-cheat days almost as often.  I exercise on a regular basis, if walking counts. I mean, it's hard to go throughout the day without walking, I don't see why people make such a big deal of it. As far as my weight, it's been up and down, and I'm blaming it on medication. Yeah, that sounds good.  I know what you're thinking, "Well James, why don't you stop your medication then?"  I can't.  You wouldn't like my off my meds. James Smash.

Have you ever had a dream that all your goals in life we achieved?  Yeah, me neither.  I usually have dreams about running away completely naked from a Klingon. Go figure.

Structure, We All Need It

So here's the deal. Structure.  I've decided that the blog needs a bit more structure.  I am going to try out having regular sections on it, and see how that goes.  Feedback is appreciated and mandatory.

I was looking on Groupon the other day and saw that there is a murder mystery dinner on there.  It's at the Stone Lion Inn in Guthrie.  That is supposed to be one of the most haunted places in Oklahoma.  My interest peaked.  There is something about having my wits scared out of me that is awesome.  This is also the reason I ride with Lyndsay when she drives.  I am on the fence about just getting the tickets and then Lyndsay will feel like she has to go or it will be a waste of money, but as I have just explained about the Inn, odds are good that she will read this and stop me.  If she isn't up for it, would anyone else be?

I have always fancied (yes fancied) myself a brilliant actor with a wide range of acting abilities.  However, after reading about this murder mystery I thought about myself as an actor in it.  I would be be nervous so close to the 'non-actors' (it's what we call them in the biz) that my timing would be all off.  I have created a lovely comic to demonstrate:

See, I'd blame the first child that walked into my line of sight.  I think I'll skip on being an actor at one of these and stick to be an over acting bystander.

The Regular Dad series is going well, I did take a break from it for a few days, but I'm back on it and soon the first episode will make you laugh so hard you might rupture a bladder.  Seriously though, if you do rupture anything while watching or thinking about it, don't blame me, my lawyers Mr. Mason and Mr. Matlock assure me that they can get me out of it in less that 60 minutes.  I'm finding the hardest part so far with creating the series is figuring out how to get the girls to act on command.  Madison especially does not want to be on camera, and Victoria jumps in the camera as soon as it starts recording. Alexandria is neutral most of the time.

Ok, so I'm one more thing to add to today's entry, and that is a thought.  My youngest, Madison, turned 4 on the 12th.  I now am the proud father of 4, 5 and 8 year old girls. Little by little I am coming to terms with my aging, but it occurred to me that in addition to my aging, I have to cope with my daughters aging as well.  Some advice I receive all the time (and on several occasions from complete strangers) is to cherish each moment because you won't get a second chance and they pass so quickly. I have realized it is so true, and everyday with them is a gift, and not everyone gets three gifts a day like I do.  So even with all the yelling, screaming, fighting, and groin hitting (them hitting me of course) I love every minute of it, even if it is not apparent at the time. Being a dad is awesome and heartbreaking.

Ok, so I'm like an Apple Strudel, Crusty and flaky on the outside while sweet and gooey on the inside. I don't have any apple chunks though, I mean unless I've eaten an apple and got sick and barfed up some apple chunks, but I probably won't be sweet when that happens.  Forget the strudel thing. 

Thank you everyone for reading, and remember - when life gets you down.  That's it. Just remember it.

Realizations That I Didn't Know Some Things

First off, I know, I know - you're thinking "James, surely there isn't anything you don't know!" Normally I would agree, but I've been reading and thinking - I've learned a few things that were new to me.  I'll share a few of them.

• Driving 5 miles over the speed limit won't get you there a lot faster, and driving 5 miles under the speed limit may get you there a little slower, however, the difference in MPG is definitely worth the longer drive.  (I knew this, but I was shocked at some of the statistics)
• Carrots don't actually help you see better.
• Kale Chips make me gag a little.
• I enjoy making my lunch way too much.
• Eggs are delicious, but they are also a super fast laxative for me, just fyi.
• Sometimes it's better to give than receive, especially stomach viruses and colds and flus, etc.
• I am way too busy to play my Xbox One like I should. Just saying. It was expensive.
• Little boys from down the street that come over to play with my daughters are annoying and I will eventually smite them.
• Telling someone you will smite them doesn't have them same effect it did in ... the 15th century or so.
• I like telling someone that I shall smite them. Try it.
• I really enjoy updating my blog.

According to my traffic indicator, I have a lot of loyal readers who check back every week to see what nonsense I've posted.  I think you guys are awesome, and I thank you.  I think I'm going to stop this blog entry with that serious thank you, I don't want to keep going and screw up the mood. Oh crap.

Basking in the Glory

First of all, I don't actually bask. The definition is: 'to lie exposed to ..." whatever, it doesn't matter. I just don't lie exposed. anymore. Court Ordered.

The blog will be changing visually over the next few weeks. I'm working on getting the best fit, so until I find it, you will have to suffer. AND you will like it.

Now I would like to take some time to talk about my new web series, Regular Dad. I've gotten a few of them in the old noggin and I'm actually about to release episode 1 and I'm already happy with it. I mean I haven't finalized or rendered the video and I haven't had anyone view it and tell it me it's great, but I'm an optimist.

Speaking of being a dad, this past week I had the honor of taking each of my daughters on a date. I like to take them out and get them a little toy once in a while, so sue me.  I enjoy the daddy daughter time and they enjoy the toy.  I will however, space them out like I used to.  I mean I can't do the whole restaurant and shopping thing 3 nights in a row again. I mean ever. I won't.

I know, it's late, but hey, look at it this way - you get twice as much of me this week. :)

Untitled Post About Something

Ok, rough week.  On the bright side I've lost about 5-6 pounds. Bad news, it was due to stress.  So to meet my goal weight I have to get really stressed. I don't want that. So back to plan B - hard work.  Enough about my flabby, yet oh so adorable physique.

I got a car! After much research, I decided I wanted this:

A 2005 Dodge Magnum RT with a 5.7L Hemi.  I like it. a lot of people think it's a station wagon, and on the title it says station wagon, but to me it's a daddy sport vehicle with occasional seating for family. It was a complicated process to find one that fit my wants ... I mean, needs, but it has paid off so far. I'll allow you some time to ooo and aahhh.

This will be the end of this entry. Sorry, like I said stressfull week, so you don't want to hear about that.

Also - the first Regular Dad episode is in the works.  In the future I will be taking questions so that I can answer them on the show. Put your thinking caps on and work up some great questions!

Cook Du Jour

One of my little known talents is that I can cook. Not just opening a can of Spaghetti-Os and zapping them in the microwave, I mean smack Gordon Ramsey in the back of the head good.  Maybe not that good, but if he did try my food I'd hit him in the back of the head and when he woke up I'd tell him the flavor knocked him out.  Lately I've been embracing that talent a little more.  I've been cooking meals at home to provide a healthy alternative to fast food or dining out.  I've loved it, and the fact my daughters tell me how wonderful it is melts me heart. They aren't lying either, they are actually eating everything on their plate which is unusual.

I feel that I have the duty to respond to the allegation, from my sister, that I was near a heart attack when I beat her at jumping rope.  She has also said the she was not actually competing. Isn't that cute? My daughters do the same thing when I win at something. They all of a sudden "weren't playing."  It's ok though, I'm planning a triathlon that will be broadcast on the inter nets.  The gauntlet  is thrown down.

The events will be announced at a later date (as soon as I find out what her weaknesses are).


I know this one is short. Stop Laughing, I was talking about this blog entry. Your mind is in the gutter. Back on track - as I said, this one isn't long, but the length doesn't really matter, it's how you use the content of it.  I usually send a few days thinking up witty things to say, or my theories of the universe to discuss and share, but this week I didn't.  I really felt blah.  So Cheer me up. Ready ... and ... go.  Now.  Geez, this isn't working. Try harder next time.  Until then, I leave you with this thought.

What, it's my thought I left you with, not words I typed.  My thoughts don't leave my brain, and boy am I glad - I could get into a thousand problems at once.

Think to you later.

A Funny Thing Happened on the way to ... where was I going?

Did you ever read someone's Facebook or Twitter status\update and it was so hypocritical or just wrong that you wanted to call them out on it? There's been that emotion a lot inside of my brain.  My heart stops my brain signals from lashing out and being rude, yet correct.  I mean, we know I'm right.

People do hypocritical things all the time, and if we tell them that they did - boom, angry town.  Even if you have their best interest at heart, they don't like to hear how to live their lives or spend their money, etc, etc.

Now that I got that out of the way, I want all of you who pointed out that I weighed more at the end of my DietBet than I did when I started that I'm not talking to you. Poopyheads.

Seriously though, I really failed at this one, but I can always try for the next one.  I'm getting a good start by going on a Natural Nutrition 28 Day Program. (Thanks Maranda!) I'm human, and I'm sure I'll make a mistake, you know - just one, but it looks like an excellent start.  I'm getting back to the home gym too, I've got enough there to get me toned (I feel awkward using the word 'toned' - pretend I said 'overwhelming ripped').

For those of you asking about my book (or short story to be exact) - I'm nearing the end of the third in the series and will release both the second and third at the same time.

On February 4th, 1999, I met Lyndsay Armstrong on a blind date.  She must really have been blind because we have been together ever since. We've been together for 15 years! Our togetherness can almost get a drivers license!  Our 10th anniversary is this May 29th.  Get your credit cards ready because I'm going to be making an Amazon wish list and I expect everyone to buy the crap she wants, or else I have to - and I really, really don't want to.

Hm... I think that's it for now... Oh yeah, I beat my sister at jump rope, she said she wasn't trying to compete, but whatever - she tried, and failed. Boom.