Don’t be That Person

Never let someone else’s negative or misplaced attitude and actions discourage you from becoming the best person you can be. 

Meetings and Partings

In our life we will have many meetings and partings.  I have spoke about this before. Some partings are final, some are not. Meetings happen all the time. 

Something to think about is that you will have just as many partings as you do meetings, in one way or another. I know it’s morbid,  but eventually we will all have to say goodbye to everyone, so make the time you have with people count. 

Without going into detail out of respect for both parties, let just say I'm not in the same relationship I had been in. I'm not upset about my situation, in fact I have three wonderful ladies who keep me pretty busy as it is.   

I know people like a good story, but the long and the short of it is that sometimes people just are not compatible. It’s the lead a horse to water saying in practical application, going both ways, if that makes sense. I’ve learned a lot about myself, good and bad, but more than anything I discovered my self worth. 

Someone once told me to focus on myself and the right people will enter my life, well, that seems very true at this point. I do have a great support system and a back log of leather projects, so that helps a lot. I am at a point where the future is looking pretty good.  I do have some things to get past, and I do have to get back on my diet and exercise plan that I've neglected. And my writing! I now have so much to add, I might get it completed!

Sometimes things hurt.  Things hurt for a reason.  I have been told for some time from multiple sources, that people come into your life to be a lesson or a blessing, I believe this.  There isn't a positive or negative connotation added to this, it's just a fact. I have learned a lot and although there have been so many reasons for me never to try again, I am and I will, and I'm very happy with that part of my life right now.

Everyday is a struggle. Work (Leather business), depression, anxiety, children, people who want to butt into your business, the list goes on and on.  I'm dealing with it on a daily basis, and it wears me down, but when you have the right and true people in your life, it gets easier, and that's where I'm at, well, I'm at the beginning of that phase.

Thank you for a the birthday wishes yesterday, it made me feel incredibly loved!

There are more adventures ahead, we will just have to see what they are, but rest assured, things will not get dull.

Until next time dear readers...

Day by Day

A lot of you know that I'm currently in a medical position that working isn't possible.  The alternative for now is to stay at home, and either read, clean house or watch TV.  I admit, I do a lot of the latter.

I've got a lot on my plate, but everything takes time. With all this "free" time, I've did a lot of reflecting.  Reflection is good, but it's really what you do with what you learn from said reflection.  There are a lot of things in my life I need to work on, some I can do on my own, some I can't.  For instance, I can really get back to writing on my own, but as for my medical issues, I have to rely on professionals for that.  That being said, it takes the correct professionals, as I have found that some of the ones where I live should go back to school. For my GI\hernia issues, there is a particular surgeon I've seen who I'm now convinced should not be allowed to do anything regarding GI and hernia issues, as I now have worse problems than when I began seeing that doctor.  I won't mention names, obviously, but I have filed formal complaints to the hospital and state agencies. 

Enough of my complaining, what I really want to talk about is the parts I can work on by myself.  As I mentioned, writing is one of the key areas I'd like to get back to focusing on, so little by little, I force myself to sit down, open up my book in progress and write.  A little more each day goes a long way to the end product.  That made me think (the philosophical part of me kicks in), if I make a little progress each day (on anything, not just my writing), then I can see the change, but others can not.  Sometimes we make a lot of progress (any progress is great), but if we depend or rely on the opinion of others for validation of that progress, we will be let down 99% of the time, and that in turn will cause us not to progress any more.

Right now, there is a lot of negativity in my life that I'm having to deal with.  Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of positivity as well, it's just that the negativity level is too far up the meter.  I do my best to deal with it, in my own way.  I can not rely on others to tell me I'm doing well handling it, because everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has their own view on how things should be handled.  Guess what?  I've got this.  I can and will deal with everything, but just as progress on my book, the progress on dealing with the negative people and things in my life is slow as well.  If you remember the inventory process that I've mentioned several times, there are people on this inventory list that I can not (or will not) cut out, no matter how negative and downright mean they are.  In the end, I love these people, and in their own way, I know they love me. 

To wrap this up, I would hope that your takeaways from this rant are that 1) Any progress is great, and 2) Don't look for others for validation.

As always, feel free to write me with your comments\questions\concerns and I will respond, as always.

Until next time, dear readers...

To Grow (Fall Forward)

It's never too late to grow.  It's never too late to admit your mistakes.  There is an amazing speech by Denzel Washington, in which he says it's ok to mess up, it's ok to fall, but fall forward.  Learn from your mistakes, learn from them and make better decisions and choices.  We all are imperfect, and we will mess up, we will falter, but we should take those moments as opportunities to better ourself or others.

In my life, I've made many mistakes, some big, some little.  Always, on the stumbling blocks I had dwelled too much on them.  It takes practice, but even the worst negative can turn into the biggest positive in your life.  I've had close friends and relatives depart from this world, and I harbored many regrets, most commonly that I never let those people know what they meant to me.  Sure, they might have known, but I would have preferred that I made it absolutely clear how much they meant to me.  The solution? Simple actually, while you have those you love, tell them exactly how much they mean to you, don't let them ever wonder how you feel.  Sounds a bit mushy maybe, but it's not always like that.  You can tell a coworker\friend that you respect their work ethic, or their dedication.

Now, I said it was simple, but if you are like me and a confirmed longtime introvert, it may take some practice, but the benefits are well worth going out on a limb with your feelings.  You both benefit from the act.

I guess this post is mainly an affirmation of some changes I'm actively making in my life.  To all of you, my readers, I do appreciate all of you, even those who message me to let me know that they liked my post, but in paragraph 3, section 5, I used "to" instead of "too."  You all play a big part in my life, and I am grateful for each of you.

There is a project I'm working on that I'm documenting, and I'll share in a later post, but I think a lot of you will be able to relate\appreciate it.

Until next time, dear readers...

Everybody’s Working For The Weekend

Yeah, I borrowed a lyric from a song for the title, big whoop.  It’s actually relevant to my blog post, so I did it, sorry - not sorry.

Let’s dig right in.  The “ideal” workweek for Americans (and all of us Earthlings probably) is Monday through Friday 8 or 9 AM to 5 PM.  I know that’s not what the majority works (and the world couldn’t function if we all did), but the idea I’m trying to convey is that everyone wants a break.  They want some time to relax, work on a home project, or spend time with loved ones, more time than the 5PM - Bedtime schedule that the weekday provides.

::Enter Weekend, Stage Left::

The weekend, it seems to be the answer to all of life’s problems.

::Exit Weekend, Stage Right::

The weekend is never long enough.  Vacations are amazing, and they too, never seem long enough.  Actually sometimes too much of the wrong vacation seems like more than long enough, too long in fact.  That however, is a different story completely.  We spend so much time getting ready to relax or preparing for a break that the “normal” days go so fast because we are in a kind of autopilot.

Those who are friends with me on Facebook or follow me on Instagram know that a few weeks ago I had a cardiac scare.  My chest was hurting, I was’t as responsive as I should have been... It was just an awful experience and ended up getting a clean bill of health for my heart, but my GI system is being suspected of causing the heart attack like symptoms.  That makes more sense because I had GI issues as a teenager, and I really figured if I was going to have a heart attack it would have been at the gym, either doing squats or on the treadmill.

It made me realize that each day is special.  Every single day we are given, we can never get back, so it's best to make the most of each one.  Tell those you love that you love them, don't assume they know, it means a lot to someone to get validation or confirmation that you relationship is solid.

This is the point in my blog where I tell you if you want to make a life change, do it.  Don't wait, you might not get the opportunity to do it again.  Take the trip, kiss your love, embrace your children.  It's been said many times, but this hold true - your biggest regret will be not doing it.  Our most precious resource is time, and we each have a limited amount.

I'm not just talking to you, my lovely readers, but to myself as well.  I have some (potentially) life changing things in my future, and I'm ready.  Will I be scared? Probably, better pack more underwear.  Will I do my best?  Yes, and better.  If you have anything you've been wanting to start, whether it be getting in shape, changing careers or asking that special someone to be yours, do it.

Now, for those interested, I will be preaching this very message (slightly edited) to Cassie when we go on a plane or boat (she likes neither), or when I'm trying to talk her into riding a scary roller coaster.  There will probably be video if that happens.

As I draw to a close on this post, I wanted to thank you, dear reader.  I have a lot of readers, and a lot of questions sent to me, and you can keep them coming.  I personally answer each question, and sometimes I post them here in case a lot of people ask the same question.  I started writing this blog years ago as kind of a therapy, writing is very cathartic for me. Between this blog, my book of short stories, my biography, and my neglected personal journal I do write a lot.  I guess what I'm trying to say is that you have been a part of that therapy and I thank you.

Until next time, dear readers...

Moving On

Well, the time has come.  I have to do something I don’t really want to do, but should do.  Layla is going to be sold.  For those of you who don’t remember, Layla is my Hummer.  My 2003 Yellow H2.  My beastie.  

While, yes, I am a little broke up over having to get rid of her, it’s not so much that event that’s changing to much in my life.  I’m starting my life with a woman who loves and car3es for me, and I do the same in return to her, I’ve moved houses, changed schedules, changed diet, there is just a lot going on. I’m muddling through right now, but I will get on top of things pretty quickly, at least, that’s th hope.

One thing I wanted to move forward with and have been working on forever is the “Regular Dad” series.  The idea started years ago, and I’ve made a few trailers, and wrote a few scripts, but I haven’t actually produced an episode, but that is going to be rectified soon.  

I do have a lot of projects coming at me, and it is hard to handle.  Plus, it’s not just projects, it’s problems.  Mine, others, doesn’t matter, I help as much as I can and try to fix things, and I realize that not everything can be fixed.  The other day I saw a post that said (basically) don’t be too busy filling others cups that you run out from your own.  In the past I was made to feel guilty for doing something for myself.  I was made to feel selfish and greedy for trying to help myself, trying to bring up my spirits.

For those of you following my body transformation progress, know that July was officially bulk month.  At least, that’s what I’m calling it.  I got really busy with work, family and moving that I paid little attention to meal planning, but that has changed.  August shall be the month of gains!!!

Until next time, dear reader...

On Death and Dying (Not the Book)

I find myself here thinking a lot about life and death lately. They are forever linked, but not one in the same.  Different religions have different ideas and teaching about life after death, and there are many similarities between some of said religions.  This is not that article though, I’m not getting into a debate on religion, and which one has it “right.”  Never talk about politics or religion on a blog.  Just kidding, about 40% of blogs are dedicated to just those topics alone, but for my purposes, I will try my best to refrain.

Last week, Cassie’s sister laid to rest her not yet three month old baby.  If you have read my blog in the past, you know I don’t handle death well, I’m not sure why.  For whatever reason, I avoid the topic and when death happens, I still try to avoid it unless it is just unavoidable.  I have been to funerals where the deceased passed unexpectedly and suddenly, but not someone so young.  I hope I never have to again.  Never again.

This isn’t a post about a specific death or death in general, actually to the contrary this post is about life.  More specifically, about living life.  Our time upon this globe is very brief (yes, quoting\paraphrasing Dickens), and it is too short to be anything other than happy.  Don’t spend your time trying to make others feel bad so that you feel better by comparison.  Lifting up your fellow man is far more rewarding than pushing them down.  I’m not saying you should be someone who is constantly helping anyone and everyone, no, I’m not saying that at all.  Being kind doesn’t mean you need to be gullible, if someone consistently acts a negative way or hurts you repeatedly, you should avoid a situation where you would be putting yourself in a position to be hurt.  Common sense does play a part in all this.

You never get a wasted day back.  Lazy days are mentally refreshing, but only on occasions.  Again, time is a resource that you can never get back.  An interesting parallel I will mention is that recently I read quite a few articles and a doctoral thesis on time travel.  It was very interesting that on paper, forward travel (faster than we currently go) is possible.  Ther are many variables that we currently don’t have the technology or comprehension on the subject, so we wait until we do.  The funny thing was that when traveling back in time was mentioned, it was stated to be much more difficult and the requirements for the theory were impossible to reproduce, i.e. we need a containable black hole. Yeah.  It was fun to read on the topic for a while and daydream about what I could go back and fix, but on the other hand, everything that has happened made me who I am, and I like who I am right now, so why would I change it?  It is an ethical\moral\mental challenge to try to grasp the possibility.

Enough of my rambling, for those who keep asking, yes, I will release another podcast, just hold on to your pants.

Until next time, dear readers...

Truths Be Told Here

OK, so being honest is one of the best traits a person can have.  Honesty is always the best route to take, even if it hurts.  Why does it hurt though when we tell the truth?  Sometimes when we tell the truth it may hurt others feelings, but if you lie to them, you are not only delaying that hurt, but making it a lot worse because that person will know you lied to them when they find out the truth.  Sometimes we lie for our own personal reasons, almost a self preservation mechanism.  For instance, children will often lie when asked if they did something wrong, even if they did it right in front of you.  It almost seems like deception is in our nature, but with work and perseverance, you can win that battle.  Here are a few truths (with my now famous “no explanation” list):

1. I don’t always call people back.
2. M&Ms are my go-to cheat snack. They will be the death of me.
3. As much as I try not to, I will let some people down, and it hurts deeply each time.
4. I have a very small circle of very close friends, and a medium circle of great friends.
5. I worked in a call center for a flower company for a week, but the callers were way too negative for me.
6. I love photography.
7. My goal is to be a personal trainer full time.
8. I don't always smile, but that doesn't mean I'm unhappy.
9. I have cut my left knee open twice, once when I was 4 and once when I was 12.
10. I have a fondness for all superheroes, but I specifically have a Batman complex.
11. I have five tattoos, with plans for more.

I know, kind of random, but sometimes my brain is random.  As always, you can send me all your comments, questions, or concerns, directly to me at jaydee.riggs@gmail.com.  And for those of you wondering about the next podcast, hold on tight, it is in the works.

Until next time, dear readers...

Everyday Problems

So,  I’ve had a lot of people congratulating me on my fitness progress.  I have personally thanked each person, and I am proud of my outward transformation.  Losing 50+ pounds is an amazing feet for anyone, so I am not selling myself short, rest assured.  Now, the everyday problems I face aren’t so much outward as inward.

This might be a shocker to some, but I have mentioned this previously, I am bipolar, type 2. What does that mean? It means I have mood swings more than the normal person does (because even normal people have mood swings, don’t lie to yourself), and I end up depressed more than happy (or manic\hypomanic).  As a result, I try to keep all my feelings bottled up and inside.  I try to focus on the task at hand so I’m not worried about the million other things going on in my mind.  Like what things? Everyday things.  Do I have enough money for bills, groceries, and gas? Can I buy this thing I think I need and still be ok at the end of the month? How long can I drive with the needle on E?  Simple everyday stuff like that is what I dwell on and end up assuming the worst.  

How do I deal with it?  Well, medication sometimes helps (not at the moment), but otherwise I do like I said, get super focused on a task at hand.  As a result, when you see me at the gym, I have a very determined look on my face.  I didn’t get the nickname “The Machine” for nothing.  The down side to this is that when I’m in that mode, let’s use the gym as an example, it makes me very intimidating and unapproachable.  I don’t mean to come off that way, but I do see that when I’m in that mode, I can absolutely appear that way.  I can’t tell you how many messages I get from people I saw at the gym and they said they wanted to talk to me to say hi or whatever but it looked like I would have pulled them apart or screamed at them or something.  Let me assure you that I won’t do either.  If you want to talk to me, go for it, I’ll take my headphones off and take time for human contact.  You’ve got a green light, so go for it.

I always get a little kick out of when I hear about a wealthy person so started off with nothing talk about how their everyday money problems slowly went away and the problem was "what do I spend my money on?" instead.  That would be an awesome problem to have, just saying, but until then I think I can deal with the everyday problems, and I will, everyday.

Until next time, dear readers...

Story Time

So, from last post to now a whole lot as happened, and with everything the way it is, it make me want to tell a story.  Sit back, relax and enjoy this tale of mine.

Imagine there is a man.  This man dated a woman.  This woman planned a surprise visit (she lived an hour or so away) on the man’s birthday.  The man had went through some hard times and was briefly staying with his parents.  The man’s mother wasn’t fond of the man’s girlfriend because her outward appearance was unconventional.  The man loved the woman for her, her appearance doesn’t mean a lot to him, although she was beautiful.  The man’s mother thought it was very forward for the lady to show up, although she had already discussed it with the woman, and the man’s sister.  They knew, it wasn’t a surprise to them.  It was one of the best birthdays I’ve ever had.  The man’s mother decided to judge her without knowing everything about her and hearing her past, judged her on who she was, not who she is.  She isn’t the person she was, and the man isn’t the person he was, which for a very long time wasn’t in a good place.  Both the man and woman had pasts they weren’t proud of, but they did not let that define who they were now.

The man and woman had fallen deeply in love, and after a few months decided to move in together.  They found a place that would fit the woman’s children and the men’s children, as best as their budget would allow.  After another few months, keep in mind that the mans mother disliked the woman so bad, she did not want her or her children in her house.  It was very silly.

A few months later, the woman got pregnant.  The man wanted to avoid the drama of his mother’s reaction, so he chose not to tell her.  The man and woman were very happy, but she did not like the secrecy, and rightfully so.  Fast forward nine weeks, and they went to a doctor’s appointment.  The man and woman looked at the ultrasound screen in terror.  The doctor came in.  He informed that, yes, our baby was dead.  The precious life that they created was now in heaven.  It was too much for both of them.  They did not know how to react.  The woman decided to leave, go back to what she left before she met the man.  The man tried to find love, but he knew in his heart he still loved the woman.

A couple of months had went by, and things were bad enough that the woman realized, as she did when she left that she loved the man more than anything, and wanted to spend her life with him, and no other man.  The man left his girlfriend, the woman left the other man, and they reunited.  The mans mother still did not like the woman.  The man’s mother still had not tried to get to know the woman.  The future for the man and woman is solid, they know what they want and they deal with people naysaying on a regular basis.  They have hurt some people along the way, and they are not unfeeling towards what they have done.  They regret some actions, but they are working to rebuild some of the trust they lost during that time.  They are willing to prove their love, they do plan to spend the rest of their life together.  The man is upset with his mother, but his ex-wife is harassing him as well.

The man’s ex-wife, who has since remarried, to the boy that she cheated on the man with, has now stuck her nose into the man’s business.  She says she doesn’t want the children that they had together to be around the woman.  The ex-wife is upset because when she was married to the man, she could control him, as she is a very, very controlling person.  Now that she can’t control the man, it frustrates her to no end, so she tries to use their children as a tool to hurt him.  She doesn’t want their children around the woman, but she has never sat down and talked with her, she is judging only appearance.  The ex-wife is petty and a fool.  The ex-wife has no say on this and it is driving her to the point of calling the man and spending 5 minutes or so screaming and cursing at the top of her lungs at him. The man is not afraid of her, because she is a small person, and small people think only of themselves.

The man and the woman are happy.  All of their children are happy.  They are safe.  They are home.  The man loves the woman, and the woman loves the man.  There love is never ending but forever growing.  No matter what anyone says, they know that together they are stronger that their struggles.

End of Story, for now...

Sorry for the length on this post, but take what you will from this post, that’s all i can say.

Until next time, dear readers...

All Apologies

So, a lot of things have transpired since my last post.  I’ve made people mad, and I’ve made people happy, and I’ve came to the same conclusion that many people already have.  You can’t please everyone, and if you do, you are lying to them or to yourself.

I’ve never in my life set out to hurt anyone.  I’m not that type of person.  I have however, ended up hurting some people, and I will be eternally sorry for that.

In the end, you have to do what you feel is right in your heart.  You may make people mad when you do something that is right for you, and although that is horrible, again, you have to do what you feel is right for you,

So, you might notice the new website address.   I’ve been changing a few things, and this is one of them, the site is now mytypographything.com, since it has expanded beyond just a normal blog.

To those I’ve hurt, please know that it was never my intention, and that I do care for you deeply.  To those who are in my life, making me happy, thank you.  I haven’t really been this happy for some time, and it’s an amazing feeling.


Until next time, dear readers...

(Another) Word on Divorce

So, I still get a lot of questions about my divorce and how I’ve coped with it. Here’s what I’ll say, everything else (well, this too) is in my book, be looking for that.

My divorce.  It changed my life, in all sorts of ways, and really to this day affects me.  With no details being given, let’s just say I had a reason to mistrust, and there is little else on this earth that hurts like having to say goodbye to someone who is still living, especially when you have so much you’d like to say, but you know it would fall on deaf ears.

The night I was essentially kicked out of my own home was horrible, I still occasionally have nightmares that relive that evening.  I literally lost (almost) everything, with just four words, “I want a divorce.”  Of course, there were some problems, but the ones she was bringing up were things that had been resolved, so she was just looking for a reason, and I wasn’t ready to end things just yet, but that didn’t matter, she was done.  There was no, “Hey, I think we are having issues, let’s work on them,” there was just a “get out.”

It cuts incredibly deep, and has changed the way that I look at any new relationship.  I’ve been through several relationships, and there is always several factors that are different now.  First of all, I have three beautiful girls and their opinion means a great deal to me.  Being the sympathetic children they are, if they see that the person is making me happy, then they like them, if not, well, they let me know.  As I’m looking for a potential lifelong partner, their opinion is almost more important than mine in some regards.  I’ve had my parents weigh in on occasion, and again, I value their opinion, but what it all boils down to is trust.  Can I trust this person? There have been those I trusted, even after my divorce, which turned out to be a bad idea.  There has been a lot of emotions going through my head as I had tried to date.

Where am I at now?  Well, that’s my business, but let’s just say, finding the right person to trust and love isn’t easy, and when you do, it has the potential to be absolutely amazing.  I’m extremely careful whom I place my heart in care with.

A Simple Yes or No

In life, we as human beings tend to try to over complicate things.  We create problems where non exist.  On the other side of that coin, we also have a tendency to overlook problems, or ignoring issues all together.  We are a complicated species.

I’ve been guilty of both sides of this problem on multiple occasions, and will likely continue to do so to a certain degree.  I had written up my next blog post and it was more or less a rant piece on why people can’t see what’s glaring at them in the face sometimes.  Even with someone pointing it out,m it’s like they have blinders on in that regard.  It ended up getting more personal than I had intended, which made me realize, I was too close to the situation.  I really took a few steps back any analyzed  (over analyzed I’m sure), the situation  and that’s when it dawned on me.  Sometimes when people say they want your help, that’s not exactly what they mean.  They mean they want your support, even if you see the dangers of their actions, they just want you there to listen, to tell them it will be ok, even if that may be a lie.

There is a big difference between respecting someone’s choice and agreeing with it.  Sometimes we get so fixated on an end result, we ignore bothe the good things and bad things that happen along that journey.  I still respect my friends choices, and I won’t point out any red flags anymore,  I will acknowledge the good things that were a result of that person’s choices. Admittedly that puts me in a quiet position most of the time, but people will see what they want to see and are quick to place blame on those who point out someone else’s error.  People need to choose for themselves what they will and won’t accept in regards to how they are treated.

This has been a hard lesson for me to learn.  I grew up with a mindset that right is right and wrong is wrong. You don’t act a certain way, and you don’t allow yourself to be treated a certain way.  People grow up differently though, and what isn’t acceptable to one person is completely acceptable to another.  I’m not saying one person is right and the other wrong, I’m just saying their perspectives aren’t the same.  

Sometimes being honest means not being kind, or telling people things they already know, but don’t want to hear.  I’ve started implementing a very simplistic way of thinking.  It’s a yes or no system.  Does the person know what you are going to tell? Yes? No need to tell again, they don’t want to hear it. Will it harm the person to say it? Yes? Don’t say it.  Do they want your opinion? No? Just give them your support and be there to listen,  A lot of life’s big issues can actually be boiled down to a yes or no answer system.  Do you know it’s harmful? Then don’t do it. Do you have faith that it can be done? If yes, put you’re all into it.  Always remember though, if your all isn’t good enough for it, it’s not good enough for you.

Also, I want to bring up for the billionth time the word honesty. Just be honest, it saves time, heartache and so much more,  I respect someone who hurts my feelings by being honest so much more than someone who lies to try to not hurt them.

Until next time, dear readers...

RedCon1

As many of you have heard, I am now a Tier Operatior for RedCon1, a supplement company.  I do not back anything i have less than the upmost belief in, and this is one of those products that does exactly as it advertises.  I have been using their products for a while and my results have been amazing, and yes, are all legal and non banned substances.  People want to know how to try their products without making a large purchase, and that is as simple as ordering samples.  Use my code T20JRiggs and you will get a 20% discount.  If you know me in person, I would be glad to share some samples of product with you, just be sure to email me!

I am looking forward to a great future with this company, and I am looking forward to what other amazing products they come out with.  As a side not, these are also the best tasting products I’ve had to DATE, which says a lot.

Order Here:

Let me know what you think!

Until next time dear readers!

A Long, Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far, Far...

So, it’s been a few days since my last post.  A lot has happened.  I’ve been busy, and I mean busy. Between work, kids, gym, personal training, and personal stuff, I’ve had about 10 minutes of “free” time (which is spent washing dishes).  I’ve gotten a whole lot of feedback on my last post.  The majority of it was positive, but some of the negative ones are sticking with me, which provided me with an epiphany.

In life (in general), the negative things tend to stick better in our memory.  This is because they hit on our emotions and insecurities more so than positive things.  It’s normal.   Think about your childhood, you will remember good things (I hope you do), and you will remember bad things (I know you will), and sometimes the scales are tipped a little unfairly.  Sometimes we get stuck on fixing the negative and ignore maintaining the positive.  It’s all about changing your mindset, and it’s not an easy task by any stretch.

Ok, so, just some little notes here...

As I’m sure you remember, I’ve been looking to get sponsored as an athletic performer, and I’ve had some interest, and some success.  Saying too much will obviously jinx it, so, that’s about as clear\vague as I’m going to get at this point.  I’m still getting closer to getting my personal trainer certification, and when I have some extra money laying around, I’ll pay for the certification exam and go from there.

Right now, I’m really busy, which is probably a good thing, but it does cut out time for some things, and I’m trying to juggle my schedule to make sure I can get to those things.  It’s a hectic time, but I must absolutely say that I am extremely grateful for everyone in my life, and to you reading this (yes, you!) I am very grateful for you too.

Now, my podcast is going well, listener base is starting to rise slowly, but it is rising, comments and questions are coming in, and I love it!  Good or bad, let me know what you think, ask me anything, ands I will answer, unless it’s of a personal matter.  Also, for you Apple listeners, it should show up in the apple podcast app shortly, I know that will make a few of you very happy, lol.

As always, I strongly encourage you to ask me questions, give me feedback or just say hi.  I usually respond relatively quickly, so fire away!

Until next time, dear readers...

James ‘The Machine’ Riggs

A little dramatic? Too much? Not enough? Trying to figure out my ring name, as in boxing ring.  I’m liking this one right now, and it’s just the nickname I have at the gym, so I didn’t have to think hard.  It helps I have machinery tattooed on my right leg.

Around this time of year (end of year), it’s customary for you to reflect on all of your inadequacies over the past 12 months and see about changing some things.  This is something I try to do throughout the year, I mean, if I list out all my problems one time a year, it’s going to be a long list to look at.  Break it into chunks, every few months do your personal inventory.  More than just making your inventory, address it, try to get the problem solved.

Enough about all that though, I’m working up another of my “lists with no explanations.”  It it shaping up well, so I’m hoping you like it.  There will be a podcast counterpart to the blog entry, and I might go a little in depth there, but who needs feelings, right?


Back to the boxing front, I’be watched all the boxing movies I could find and I am sure I could be the next champion.  That’s of course a joke.  Runner up is probably more realistic.  Seriously, I am taking up boxing, and we will see if I can avoid getting a concussion.  Also,m we will see if I can avoid a concussion.  (See what I did there?)

Until next time dear readers...

New Beginnings

There is a lot going on in my life right now. A lot.  There is a lot of stress, anxiety and excitement.  I’m not complaining, the changes in my life have been 100% for the better.  I am happy.  I mean I am really happy.  Sure I don’t drive a Ferrari, or live in a castle (yet), but I am happy. Isn’t that all that matters?

There is a sad side to this story though.  Although I am happy, and others can obviously tell that, there are those neigh sayers. They will ignore anything positive and attach to the negative.  It gets tiring, especially if it’s someone you love.  Expect the best but plan for the worst.  I have been living by that motto for a while now, and so far lately, I’ve mostly gotten the best.  It’s a nice change.

I haven’t talked about exercise in a while, so I’ll update you.  I am still helping people with meal and exercise plans, and results have been great.  I myself am steadily continuing on my body change journey.  My weight is fluctuating. That’s ok.  I have been having more cheat days lately, and I’m working on stopping that.  Meal planning is not easy, but meal prepping is much harder.  Honestly a good meal prep day takes up a really good chunk of the day.  I am working on a meal prep video for my Riggs Fitness site\brand.

Remember, anywhere you go, there you are.

Until next time, dear readers...

If You’re Happy and you Know It

They say being happy is a state of mind.  I agree.  I am right, now, probably happier than I have ever been.  That’s not to say everything is going the way I want it to, or that everything is sunshine and roses.  Everything isn’t. There are still things I’m working on, still projects to complete, still stuff to be done.  With all that is pending, I’m still happy.  I’m happy with the progress in my life at this point.  Everything is looking up.

I’ve read that everyone needs to take responsibility for everything in their life.  That doesn’t mean you have to accept blame for everything because that isn’t healthy.  What that means is that you need to accept the responsibility for how you react to everything in your life.  It falls in line with that taking lemons and making lemonade bit.

Bobby McFerrin was an genius.  His song, "Don't Worry, Be Happy" is a philosophical high point in our existence.  Seriously.  Things aren't always going to be great, but that doesn't mean you have to just sit down and wallow in your sorrow.  That was an unintentional rhyme, so I hope that made you smile a little bit.

About smiling.  Do it.  Fake it till you make it works in some cases.  Your smile is infectious.  There is a certain lady in my life, that whenever she smiles, I can't help but feel really, really good.  Every. Single. Time.  Smiling leads to laughing, laughing leads to forgetting about the problems currently surrounding you, and ultimately leads to you being happy.  Be the one that makes everyone happy, no one likes Debbie Downer.

I'm making this entry fairly short because I am about to start filming for a new web series that I'm working on, more on that later, but please guys, be the light that others like to turn to.  Simple.

Until next time, dear readers...

Life is a Puzzle

At least I didn’t say it was like a box of chocolates.  Seriously though, life is exactly like a puzzle.  Sometimes we think we see the image and we try to make the pieces fit that we think should complete the image, but they just will not fit.  Now, on the reverse side of that, sometimes you find, just by trying, by accident, that a piece fits.  Then the next piece then also, just fits. After a while, you stop trying to make the image what you think it should be, and allow it to become what it is supposed to be.

Too deep? Ok, well, to sum all that up is easy.  When you stop trying to make things happen, things fall into place.  To use another cliche, sometimes things have to fall apart to come together.  I have given a lot of thought into my life lessons, and really, every post on this blog.  I have a lot of readers, who have amazing hearts.  I haven’t updated in a while, because, well, it’s been a combination of things.

I’ve been busy.  Now, this doesn’t mean that I have been avoiding updating and that’s my excuse, it means I’ve genuinely been busy.  I’ve been spending my visitation time with my girls on a series of adventures.  I usually update you while we are staying at Beaver’s Bend, but this year, I forgot my laptop.  There will be pictures soon, some are already on my Facebook page, some soon to be on my Instagram. There, as always, are those who ask me how my personal life is doing, and I generally like to avoid that topic.  Something has changed that though...

Through a combination of luck and timing, I did meet someone.  When I say that, the statement carries a certain gravitas, I suppose.  I’m not the type to just put out information at random, well, not personal information, well, not this personal.  I was looking for someone, that much you know.

We started by just simply talking, or texting mostly.  In the process of getting to know each other, we discovered we had both had similar life experiences. Further on, we discovered that we had a very similar sense of humor, which is saying something, but honestly, that’s been difficult.  She is extremely intelligent, and gets my weird pop culture references.  Well, she might not get all of them, but I’m pretty sure that no one gets some of them.  Not even me.  Moving on.  We slowly (or not so slowly depending on who you talk to) realized that we really enjoyed each other’s company and conversation. We are both very happy, and I don’t see that changing anytime.

I figured I wouldn’t make this entry just a big love letter to Cassie.  I'm a happy man now, beyond what I ever expected, and all of a sudden all of those dopey love songs make sense.  I's a very, very good feeling.

Until next time, dear readers...

Real Talk

Some recent events in my life have made me wish I had a time machine. I just want to go back to past James, slap him in the face and tell him he needs to stop being stupid.

Anyone who knows me well will tell you that I always keep my word, I never lose my cool, I would do anything to help a friend, I’m incredibly loyal, and I care too much. Just so you know, I did not write this list, so please don’t think I’m that shallow. In the past few months (and maybe longer) I have acted out of character several times. This has hurt others, and myself. I can’t change what I’ve done, or it's impact, all I can do is keep reminding myself of the consequences of acting like an idiot.

During this time, I also came to the startling conclusion that if one person tells you something, it's possibly true, possibly not.  When two people tell you the same thing, it's more than likely true than not.  When you have three or more people telling you the same thing, you should probably listen.  The truth of the matter is that sometimes you see what you want to see, not what is actually there.  In my last post, I talked about inventories.  Well, I've did a huge inventory of myself recently, and I've discovered more about myself than I ever have.  I've found a lot of good things about myself, and I've found bad things about myself.  I'm working on those, and I'll be perfectly honest, it's going to be a struggle and take time on some of them.

Setting boundaries is key.  I have found that I have trouble setting boundaries with people.  You need to be honest with yourself and with them, let them know that you just won't do some things, not because you don't want to, but because once a boundary is crossed, it is much easier to cross it again. It's not a bad thing to help someone out, but don't change your boundaries in order to do so.

As I have been updating you on everything (which I've been told is too much, but, oh well), I'll go ahead and address the dating question.  I am not closed off to dating, but, as I'm sure you concluded, I didn't do so well with my recent try.  I am human, and I do make mistakes, and sometimes more than once.  I am (and always will be) in a constant state of personal growth, physically and mentally, and there have been people there at my worst, and stuck by me to hep me be my best.  I don't know where I'd be without them, and that's the type of person I'm looking for.  They are hard to find, but once I find that person, well, I'll be happy I guess is the easiest way to say it.  It's been said that when you find the once, "you'll just know."  That's wrong probably eight times out of ten.  Sure, I believe that some people just know, but they have to both "just know" before I'll believe it.  One sided relationships are far too common.  I think that I will only know if the person is right if she is by me through my struggles as well as my successes, and I'll have the same opportunity to do so for her.  Long story short, I guess I'm still looking.

I'll leave you with this, if you don't like what you see, don't blame the mirror.

Until next time dear readers...